CAPS Blog #6

One of the intercultural relationships that I am involved in is with my friend Cameron. We went to high school together, were in the same class, participated in the same sports, and even dated in junior high. We got to hang out everyday at school and also on the weekends. Cameron was always the "funny guy", there wasn't a minute I was with him and not laughing hysterically. After high school he went to another state for college, we would keep in touch but both had very busy schedules so it was hard sometimes. During our sophomore years in college Cameron came out and said he was homosexual. He had held back for so many years in fear that people would judge his character. Being from a very small town its something that not everyone would be willing to except. Cameron has since moved back to Lincoln to finish school and we continue to be great friends! It came as quite a shock to me when i found out that he was into the same sex, but never for a second did i think less of him or question our friendship. He is still the same funny guy that he's always been, we just talk about good looking guys more than girls now. 

   Our relationship brought benefits, but it brought challenges as well. Being friends with a homosexual opened my eyes to so many different things.I acquired so much knowledge about his life, his struggles, and his new found sexuality. Although he knew he was homosexual since he was in the 5th grade it was still completely new for him and took a lot of adjustments in his life. Being friends with Cameron also broke down my stereotypes about homosexual people. I realized that the friendship we have now is just as good as the friendship we had before, him being homosexual didn't change anything. I also gained competency of the homosexual community and the struggles it entails. Some of the challenges we faced was the initial anxiety that took place when we talked in person for the first time after me finding out, and seeing the negative stereotypes that come from other people. 

According to researcher Leslie A. Baxter there are different dialectical models that explain the dynamic of relationships (Martin & Nakayama 2013.) The two that i think best fit Cameron and I's relationship is the Differences-Similarities dialectic and the Static-Dynamic dialectic. We fit under the Differences-Similarities dialectic because we started our friendship based on our similarities, but our friendship continues to grow today based on our differences. We balance each other out and learn from our differences. The Static-Dynamic dialectic explains how our friendship was the same for so many years, but changed when we went to college and continues to change slowly as we get older. The change has been good and has helped us grow in our friendship.

 

References: 

Martin, J.N. & Nakayama, T.K. (2013). Intercultural Communication in Contexts (6th ed.) New York: NY: McGraw Hill.